It was Dolly Parton night in Idol last night and the results were all rather predictable.
Brook White sang Jolene as though it was the sunniest and most carefree song in the world. Then smiled vacantly as Simon raised the issue that she's rather missed the point and that her violin player was offputtingly ugly. I can't work out whether this girl is deeply cynical or whether they're about to reveal her lobotomy any day now - but I'm done with her.
The batwinged bruiser belted out something or other without missing a note or making any real impact. Someone ought to check with the INS and make sure she's not here on an exceptional talent visa as it would be in danger of being revoked
The Magic Mormon did a ballad that reminded him of home and did a nice job on it. The problem is that he really does only connect on overly earnest ballads and he comes across more as grandmother's choice than he does American Idol. He could open for Niel Sedaka. Really.
David Cook searched I-Tunes for someone to rip off, failed to find anyone and faded into the background.
Jason Castro still has dreads and those eyes - so the performance was irrelevant. Just as well really.
Kristy Lee Cook chose nice jewelry and a simple "Coat of many colors" - her last hurrah (she's safe this week but she has to go soon) wasn't really a bang, but hey she might get a gig with the ice-capades that allow her to buy back her bloody horse
Michael Johns did his Australian Rocker schick again and it worked. He's genuinely happy to be there - realizing that this is his last shot at the industry and that kind of appreciation and humility goes a long way - even if he does look like a marketing manager at a kareoke.
Ramiele Malubay is still a bobble headed midget. I can't remember anything about her last night. Maybe TiVo cut her off. Maybe she just disappeared.
And finally cut priced Whitney Syesha Mercado did - you guessed it "I will always love you" minus Dolly's sincerity or Whitney's range.
So a bit of a flat night - where competence reigned and nobody really managed to stand out. That makes it a popularity contest (bar country girl, who;s safe on home turf)... expect Ramiele, Syesha and Carly Bruiser to be tonight's bottom three
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