And I'm waiting for a cab brave enough to risk the swirling winds and double digit minuses and take me to the airport.
Brrrr
Velcro is at Eva's, the cats I'm not sure about but they certainly see my being up as a proof that it's time they were fed. I bought their silence with some cat milk and will make a run for it before they start to protest again.
Knowing that I had to get up this early made for a very restless night. I woke up at midnight, 2am. 3.30, 3.50 and gave in at 4.10. I will, of course, be absolutely knackered and no use to anyone as of about 9am today. Never allow other people to book your tickets... there's a life lesson.
Still it's good to be getting away - if only for a day or two and I am looking forward to exploring
Hope that you have weekends a little more fun than usual, it's -15C in Toronto so not taking the camera (it'll freeze, the battery will run dry and my fingers will fall off)... back Sturday night anyway
Friday, January 26, 2007
Thursday, January 25, 2007
Here it comes
I'm really hoping that my plane tomorrow morning (it's a 6.15am flight so I need to be at the airport by 4.45am) manages to take off. The Canadian Lakes are gearing up to dump cold air on us and the weather people are gleeful about the soon to be felt high winds, squalls and sub, sub zero temperatures.
We're talking about temps of -12C that feel like temps of -27C. And that's in New York. It will be the coldest day since Jan 2005 and of course it's the day that I need to leave the ground on time. We'll see.
No word on scan results yet but I'm sure that they'll come along in their own sweet time. I'll just add a little sucrose to the mix and hurry sweet time along a little.
More - and more entertaining - later today. It's too early for this.
We're talking about temps of -12C that feel like temps of -27C. And that's in New York. It will be the coldest day since Jan 2005 and of course it's the day that I need to leave the ground on time. We'll see.
No word on scan results yet but I'm sure that they'll come along in their own sweet time. I'll just add a little sucrose to the mix and hurry sweet time along a little.
More - and more entertaining - later today. It's too early for this.
Wednesday, January 24, 2007
Gearing up for Toronto
I'm not entirely sure that one gears up for Toronto, I'm told it's too laid back a place for any upward gearing. But I'm looking forward to the trip anyway - despite it having a ridiculously early start. It's gonna be nice to get away and be forced out of my comfortable Friday night rut and into exploring - or as much exploring as the cold allows.
Don't have my scan results yet - which is a good sign I think. Certainly all of my experience points towards a call from the doctor when all isn't well. I do need to call Adela today and set up an appointment to see him between his public speaking and his golfing engagements. That's not fair I know but I think that Thurs is 'clinic day' and I do wonder what he does the rest of the time.
Work is finally weighting up enough that I feel busy, i if not useful. Hard to get used to being the 'know nothing' personin the room and harder still to embrace a process that works at a much slower rate than you like to personally. I can see that it works, I just need to figure out how it's going to work when I run it.
Still worried about my ability to gain weight at the drop of a hat and my inabiliy to grow much hair at all. But the thyroid checked out fine and the scans might offer a clue. As might the fact that the gym sessions have been ramping up and we're looking at muscle building rather than fat burning. Still 5lbs in two days isn't a normal weight gain - unless it's all water, in which case I guess I'm the Dead Sea.
Okay enough of this gloomy noodling - breakfast, dog walk, work
Don't have my scan results yet - which is a good sign I think. Certainly all of my experience points towards a call from the doctor when all isn't well. I do need to call Adela today and set up an appointment to see him between his public speaking and his golfing engagements. That's not fair I know but I think that Thurs is 'clinic day' and I do wonder what he does the rest of the time.
Work is finally weighting up enough that I feel busy, i if not useful. Hard to get used to being the 'know nothing' personin the room and harder still to embrace a process that works at a much slower rate than you like to personally. I can see that it works, I just need to figure out how it's going to work when I run it.
Still worried about my ability to gain weight at the drop of a hat and my inabiliy to grow much hair at all. But the thyroid checked out fine and the scans might offer a clue. As might the fact that the gym sessions have been ramping up and we're looking at muscle building rather than fat burning. Still 5lbs in two days isn't a normal weight gain - unless it's all water, in which case I guess I'm the Dead Sea.
Okay enough of this gloomy noodling - breakfast, dog walk, work
Monday, January 22, 2007
A year since Chemo
Saturday was one year since I started chemo... thought that I'd reprint the two chemo posts from a year ago by way of 'celebration'
Looking at a long old day today. Standard chemo takes about an hour to administer... but the R part of CHOP R takes 5 hrs the first time.. infusion reactins are common and the slower they go the less likely I am to become a shivering wreck. Add in blood work and the all important Insurance Checks and you're looking at a 10 hr day.
Have loaded up the i-pod (Cyndi Lauper - The Body Acoustic). the DVD player (Deadwood Series One) and have my taking forever to read Roddy Doyle book with me (the one where the Irish guy comes to New York in the 20s) so I'm as ready as I think I can be... and looking forward to actually starting treatment.
September seems a long time ago - but that's when the cough started and when I had the first x-ray. Starting today means being finished end of July (and end of World Cup) meaning that I can start in the gym ahead of a September beach holiday. OK, maybe October (we'll head south) - besides September is the US Open and perfect, perfect weather.
Time to head off...
Well yesterday was long - but not unpleasant.
Everything went pretty much to schedule and to plan... I needed a break from the Rituxin at 100ml / hr, but a benedril shot fixed that and the rest of the infusion passed without incident and I got up to 300ml / hr without incident.
Had an M&M meets injection of orange goop vomitting spell toward the end of the day... never has vomit so closely related ad' - a whilrl, swirly, chocolate kaleidoscope of color.
Everything else was unremarkable.
Got home last night, slept well, took all the drugs suggested and feel good today... slightly strange, but by no means sick. Have walked the dog, picked up more drugs and checked football scores, brunch later... of course next couple of days will be the real test of how things are really going; worst comes at 3-5 days I'm told.
We shall see
hemo +3 today and I'm up early and ready to head in and get my white blood cell boosting shot of 'as seen on TV' Neurestra (?)
Last three days have been the tale of three coughs. Saturday my tight cough of 4 months became a deep, chesty. booming thing that had me coughing up old wounds, bits of body and (for an hour over brunch) rather a lot of blood.
Day two was less bellowing - but no return to the love lorn seal bark of yore. Lots of nasty thick phlegm yesterday.
And today, much better. What a restaurant might describe as a 'stunningly light cappucino foam' - certainly the lighest cough (and the lightest 'product' of that cough) in months and months.
Of course by way of recompense (the universe demands payment after all) I woke up singing the Boyzone version of the Cat Stevens song 'Father and Son' - at 7am!
Not the most pleasant of posts I admit - but feeling sparkly good here today, let's see how long I can keep this going
No coughing today - which is miraculous.
Managed to get out and about quite a bit and to move with phlegmatic impunity until the early afternoon when my back started to ache like a rotten tooth in a Robin Williams movie. It's agony and my immediately turning into Albert Steptoe has done nothing to help matters.
Other stuff.
Bought a vacuum cleaner with a 7 year warranty - there's optimism! - it's Italian - there's more
Started to resent unfit looking smokers - bastards, who gave you the good genes?
My brother announced / admitted that he's about to become a dad - in 7 weeks. It's a girl
Walked through the Polish part of town - marvelling at how only in NYC can you go from hip to hip replacement in 3 blocks
Fell in love with Newborns at Ralph Lauren - making me the gayest straight man in the world (but c'mon cashmeer kimonos)
Took a pic in which I looked terrible - then posted it anyway in a 'see I AM sick' statement
Looking at a long old day today. Standard chemo takes about an hour to administer... but the R part of CHOP R takes 5 hrs the first time.. infusion reactins are common and the slower they go the less likely I am to become a shivering wreck. Add in blood work and the all important Insurance Checks and you're looking at a 10 hr day.
Have loaded up the i-pod (Cyndi Lauper - The Body Acoustic). the DVD player (Deadwood Series One) and have my taking forever to read Roddy Doyle book with me (the one where the Irish guy comes to New York in the 20s) so I'm as ready as I think I can be... and looking forward to actually starting treatment.
September seems a long time ago - but that's when the cough started and when I had the first x-ray. Starting today means being finished end of July (and end of World Cup) meaning that I can start in the gym ahead of a September beach holiday. OK, maybe October (we'll head south) - besides September is the US Open and perfect, perfect weather.
Time to head off...
Well yesterday was long - but not unpleasant.
Everything went pretty much to schedule and to plan... I needed a break from the Rituxin at 100ml / hr, but a benedril shot fixed that and the rest of the infusion passed without incident and I got up to 300ml / hr without incident.
Had an M&M meets injection of orange goop vomitting spell toward the end of the day... never has vomit so closely related ad' - a whilrl, swirly, chocolate kaleidoscope of color.
Everything else was unremarkable.
Got home last night, slept well, took all the drugs suggested and feel good today... slightly strange, but by no means sick. Have walked the dog, picked up more drugs and checked football scores, brunch later... of course next couple of days will be the real test of how things are really going; worst comes at 3-5 days I'm told.
We shall see
hemo +3 today and I'm up early and ready to head in and get my white blood cell boosting shot of 'as seen on TV' Neurestra (?)
Last three days have been the tale of three coughs. Saturday my tight cough of 4 months became a deep, chesty. booming thing that had me coughing up old wounds, bits of body and (for an hour over brunch) rather a lot of blood.
Day two was less bellowing - but no return to the love lorn seal bark of yore. Lots of nasty thick phlegm yesterday.
And today, much better. What a restaurant might describe as a 'stunningly light cappucino foam' - certainly the lighest cough (and the lightest 'product' of that cough) in months and months.
Of course by way of recompense (the universe demands payment after all) I woke up singing the Boyzone version of the Cat Stevens song 'Father and Son' - at 7am!
Not the most pleasant of posts I admit - but feeling sparkly good here today, let's see how long I can keep this going
No coughing today - which is miraculous.
Managed to get out and about quite a bit and to move with phlegmatic impunity until the early afternoon when my back started to ache like a rotten tooth in a Robin Williams movie. It's agony and my immediately turning into Albert Steptoe has done nothing to help matters.
Other stuff.
Bought a vacuum cleaner with a 7 year warranty - there's optimism! - it's Italian - there's more
Started to resent unfit looking smokers - bastards, who gave you the good genes?
My brother announced / admitted that he's about to become a dad - in 7 weeks. It's a girl
Walked through the Polish part of town - marvelling at how only in NYC can you go from hip to hip replacement in 3 blocks
Fell in love with Newborns at Ralph Lauren - making me the gayest straight man in the world (but c'mon cashmeer kimonos)
Took a pic in which I looked terrible - then posted it anyway in a 'see I AM sick' statement
I have a meeting today
with a client whose name I'm not allowed to speak - even within the walls of the agency. It's not my meeting or even a meeting in which we have to do much other than listen and take notes but the fact that there are going to be new people there and that I'm new at this meant that I found it very difficult to sleep last night - I just kept waking up and wondering what the day was going to be like and worrying that I might have missed something and will be forced to perform unprepared, leaving the worst kind of impression.
I do hope it's not too long before I start taking things in my stride here. It's not tough work, no ditches are being dug and I'm smart enough to get stuff done without too many hitches, glitches and balls ups.
But still the stomach is knotted
I do hope it's not too long before I start taking things in my stride here. It's not tough work, no ditches are being dug and I'm smart enough to get stuff done without too many hitches, glitches and balls ups.
But still the stomach is knotted
Sunday, January 21, 2007
Very little to report here
the weather is cold but not nearly as sexy as you might imagine from this pic.
It's all blustery winds and aching ears here.
Silent negotiations are taking place over who takes the dog out and who gets to play their game on the bigger of the screens in the house. Each look, each sigh, each indication of comfort a plea to be let off the hook.
It's going to be a long winter
It's all blustery winds and aching ears here.
Silent negotiations are taking place over who takes the dog out and who gets to play their game on the bigger of the screens in the house. Each look, each sigh, each indication of comfort a plea to be let off the hook.
It's going to be a long winter
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