As Romney freezes his candidacy (in a potential bid to be Vice President, a bold move as McCain hates him but may need the appointment too woo conservatives without turning off independents) the Republican race looks more and more like endorsing the ancient white guy who would be tough on terror and pretty much too old to do much else.
Still McCain has some fight left in him. Some of his best lines
"I'm older than dirt, I've got more scars than Frankenstein, but I've learned a few things along the way."
"I spent several years in a North Vietnamese prison camp, in the dark, fed with scraps.Do you think I want to do that all over again as vice president of the United States?"
The Republican alternative is Huckabee. The man with Chuck Norris and God on his side. The man who believes that every sperm is sacred and that every egg comes with a plan directly from God. He's also pretty big on Creationism and things that are churchy. Which plays well in places where God is all that people have. I have to admit to having quite an affection for Huckabee. Sure he's stark raving bonkers and communing with his invisible friend Jesus much of the time but he has an "am I still in this?" attitude that's refreshing in the cut-throat, second guessing, he said - she said race.
Some of his best quotes to date.
"I'm pretty sure there will be duck-hunting in heaven and I can't wait!" --speaking to an NRA group
"We've had a Congress that's spent money like John Edwards at a beauty shop."
"Jesus was too smart to ever run for public office...that's what Jesus would do." --after being asked if Jesus would have supported the death penalty
"Which one?" --to Mitt Romney, after the former Massachusetts governor told him not to try and characterize his position on Iraq
"And the ultimate thing is, I may not be the expert that some people are on foreign policy, but I did stay in a Holiday Inn Express last night."
"If anybody wants to believe they're the descendants of a primate, they'e welcome to do it." --answering a question about evolution
All of the electricty of course is on the other side. When Hillary is one to one she's really impressive. Pulling facts to hand. Explaining plans with real conviction. Engaging. She's human. But put her on a podium and she gets a little still. She grins and gurns and shrugs and generally looks like she's squirming. The shoulders get high. She gets toothy. She looks uncomfortable. And smug.
She's smart though. Best Hillary zingers so far
"In my White House, we will know who wears the pantsuits." --on the role her husband would play in her administration
"It did take a Clinton to clean up after the first Bush, and I think it might take another one to clean up after the second Bush."
"Frankly, Mr. Mayor, I think your new hairstyle is the right way to go. After all, in Washington, the coverup is always worse than the truth." —to Rudy Giuliani, after he gave up his combover
"They asked Jesus how many times you should forgive, and he said 70 times 7. Well, I want you all to know that I’m keeping a chart."
Then there's Obama. He's light on policy and heavy on hope. Great with a crowd and bad in a debate. He stands like Caesar, with his chin high and his profile on full display. And he has the advantage of being new. He wasn't there when everyone else gave Bush permission to invade Iraq. He wasn't there to ratify tax cuts. He just wasn't there - and that means he's allowed to be right on everything. Which is a huge advange. Whenever there's a protest and the banners come out Hillary is always trying to explain how she ended up on the wrong side - Obama is out waving a placard.
Obama's best lines
"I don't want to be invited to the family hunting party." --on revelations that he and Dick Cheney are eighth cousins (Watch video clip)
"Hillary is not the first politician in Washington to declare 'Mission Accomplished' a little too soon."
"I'm so overexposed that I make Paris Hilton look like a recluse."
On his Democratic Convention speech, in which he said that "we coach Little League in the blue states and we have some gay friends in the red states": "Well, here's an update. Since the election, that gay couple I knew in the red states? They've moved back to the blue states."
"(The pundits) said you can't win in a year like this with a name like Obama. There was quite a bit of confusion at first, but it did get me free airtime on Al Jazeera."
"It's been a great ride. But I know how quickly these fads can pass. You all remember the pet rock, the mood ring, Howard Dean."
I think that if it's McCain it has to be Obama. It's a youth vs. age thing. It's a man who talks Nickelodeon and Movie Trailers vs one who talks Nickle Freakshows and seeing the first talkies. Just a generation thing.
Against Huckabee I fancy Clinton. She can take him on in the south and I think she can make him look reactionary. We shall see. It's a good race. And cracking TV.
No comments:
Post a Comment