I don't think that I can manage work today - and I feel more guilty about it you than you can imagine. It's a big week at work yet since Monday I've been sitting, close to my couch, feeling as though someone has filled my ankles with mercury (or something else heavy and poisonous). If only I had a symptom more violent or volatile. This one is so passive and yet... it seems to be enough to stop me managing to do very much. Every burst of energy is followed by the feeling that I've just completed a marathon, in costume, carrying a small woman on my back.
This, of course, is a symptom of the drugs rather than the disease but it's driving me to distraction. Ultimatelty I hate letting people down - and being here rather than at work where people need me IS letting somebody down. No amount of phone, e-mail or BlackBerry content can change that.
Mind it's such a big week that a million big people have stepped in to fill my shoes. We have company Presidents and Country Planning directors all being able in my absence so maybe I should just follow my Sydney incantation and 'let go and trust' - after all I wrote the brief, I decided on what should accompany the brief, I helped sell the brief - it's just that I won't be there to physically deliver the brief.
'Let go and trust'
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