Friday, September 05, 2008

Brrrr


CHRISTmas
Originally uploaded by Kristina_5
So with the clouds gathering and the temperatures plummeting it seemed only too apt that we head for the small "Bavarian" town of Frankenmuth --> where old people line the streets in hope of a peak at some Lederhosen and the world's largest open-all-year Christmas store plys a very off Autumn trade.

But first to the Outlet Mall where I availed myself of The North Face sale and acquired a fleece - which I then wore against the outside chill (last week's 35c is this week's 18c and it feels as though hell is attempting to call in a billion debts by freezing over all at once)

Lunch was downstairs in a "Bavarian", knick-knack-bakery-carvery basement. Entertainment was courtesy of around 200 old cars (very much in the Cruiser mode with a few Impala thrown in) which cruised the street as the old people watched, munching on a chocolate cheese cruelly named Lorraine (or something)

It was cold. It was gray. But we had Jude's car so we were quick and comfortable and the music was what I've come to know as "Single Entendre Soul" - think Otis Redding singing "Stroke it baby left, stroke it baby right, stroke it baby, stroke it we don't wanna take all night" and you have it,

Tres bizzare all around

Thursday, September 04, 2008

Grey Cloudy Sky

I think that says it all.

The parents landed
The weather turned from gorgeous to gray

Work started to get more demanding
And me's miserable

Monday, September 01, 2008

A new look-a-like

Lots of people have been commenting on the similarity between 'first woman president when the old guy croaks' Sarah Palin and Tina Fey. But I think that she looks more like Tony Soprano's therapist.

Here are some other odd facts about the next president but one

She's a moose hunter
- No that's not a euphemism, thought it sounds like one I know.

She named all of her children after street slang for heroin
- Track, Bristol, Willow, Piper & Trig

She wasn't pretty enough to win Ms Alaska
- despite being one of only three women in Alaska

Actually that's not true - she wasn't clever enough to be Ms Alaska
- she failed on the US American's finding the US of America on a map thing

Her 17 year old daughter is pregnant
- by a 'man' named Levi

Is a little confused about whether or not to stone homos
Vetoed bill denying benefits to gays, as unconstitutional. (Aug 2008)
Marriage only be between and man and a woman. (Nov 2006)
Value our cultural diversity. (Nov 2006)
Ok to deny benefits to homosexual couples. (Aug 2006)

An dof course is more fertile than Idaho manure

White suits into storage

It's Labour Day. And it's 31c. Which meant two things.

First all of the students are back in town ahead of the start of semester tomorrow. And secondly the local pool decided to extend its hours in a bid to cash in on collision of both the influx of firm young flesh looking for a place to show out and weather that allows them to shed clothing.

The pool was packed. The boys were hot - toned, muscular and enjoying the attention as they threw around a ball in a dispay of 'look at us, no look at me' peacokery.

The girls were large. Big breasted and celluliute pitted thighs. Their long term shape moving up from their knees to claim them. They lay at angles that they imagined flattering as the fat girl inside of them screamed for the ice-cream that would bring them 200 KCals closer to taking over.

Weirdly as the people get older you tend to see a reverse. Hot middle aged women with their blue-white, chunky, chubby husbands. The wives staying in shape for the day when all of that belly fat wreaks revenge on their 'better half' and sees her shopping for black with the first of the insurance checks.

It's been an incredible late summer. The skies as blue as any I can remember and the temperatures consistently in the 30s. It's been like Singapore with the added bonus that nobody was taking perfection for granted - and few expats were on hand to complain whilst leaking miserably through inappropriate clothing.

Two weeks from now somebody will have turned summer off and the temperatures will start to fall. We're seeing forecasts with highs of 18C. At that point Operation Flight starts and Jude and I start to look for weekend destinations where tan topping and time outdoors are possible.

One more winter here and then onward and upward. Or sideways. who knows. What I do know is that following that winter - those cold, dark, dangerous days where the light limits activity will come another summer. Our last here. And what a summer I have planned

Sunday, August 31, 2008

I am not responsible for the weather


Crossroads
Originally uploaded by umichtrumpet
The last month in Ann Arbor has been spectacular in terms of weather. The skies have been blue, the sun has been merciless and the temperatures have rarely dipped below 30c. It's been like Singapore. Only with lesbians. And Craft Markets. (I have a suspicion that the two are linked)

Yesterday the football season started and 10s of thousands of people swarmed into town, all wearing the Blue and Maize of Michigan and all in search of a seat outside in the street, a cold beer and a decent burger. We had one of those seats and all I could think about was "Why aren't my parents here this weekend?"

You see Michigan weather is changeable. It's 31c this week. That doesn't mean that once somebody hits the 'end of summer' button it won't be 15c next week. Summer ends like that. And when summer ends here, everything ends.

Example? Yesterday we went to one of the big outdoor pools here. We swam. We sunbathed. We read books. We watched a couple making out oblivious to the growing buzz of 'tiut-tutting'.

On Monday that pool, which had hosted around 500 sun worshippers, will close for the winter. And re-open in May. That's 9 months. Lomg winter, huh?

So I get home and I check the weather. 30c and brilliant sunshine through Tuesday (when they arrive) and then a 10c drop and 7 hrs of rain on Weds (the first day that they're 'in town')

Now we've had 55mm of rain in August. And we're going to get 100mm overnight on the first night that they're here. Bollocks. 'Cause everything that I have planned involves us being outside (at least to some degree)

But I am not The Emperor Ming. I have no control over the weather. And no responsibility for it. Nor is Flash Gordon my nemesis. True I had them delay their trip as we had a house full. But that was a 'first come, first served' deal.

So instead I will relax, take each (cold) day as it comes and breathe so deeply that even my Pilates teacher will be impressed