Saturday, August 05, 2006

A wee short post

Arrived in London yesterday after a 7 hr delay on the plane. I get on, we pull away from the gate, we're no.30 in line for the one runway. Three hours later and we're no.24 and suddenly we don't have enough fuel to get us to London and are heading back to the gate for fuel. Which takes an hour and a half to arrive. Then the crew run out of hours and we wait another hour. The Americans strap on headphones and watch movies on their laptops, the Brits get rather Bean-ish in their semi-autistic way and fume quietlty - occasionally sighing.

I talk to the Scottish crew, get my face rubbed by the 'in-flight beautician' and send e-mail after e-mail out into the ether.

Arrive in London for my meeting late - but make it. Then make it to a pub in Portland Place (£3 on the tube - one way - that's $5.70!!!) where I meet Jude's brother and his lovely girlfriend. Encourage her to forget the rather good book she's writing and instead to churn out a frothy novella filled with deviant sex and vivid descriptions. She looks almost convinced.

Train up to Redcar this morning. E'd up Xtian talks to everyone. Woman next to me stares at Sudoku without filling in a square and a bloke from M'bro loudly declares Rotherham 'a shithole'... home at last.

Second train seems to be full of kooks and weirdos... including one woman who tells me that she has a video of her hamster on her cell-phone whilst her hearing aid whistled and her jumper strained at the seems (you could hear it wanting to give)

That's it for now. Back to m'bro for a pair of prada loafers I think

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