I don't think that I've ever done an ad' that had real sex appeal. Certainly not one that could have been held up as an example of hypersexualization or moral decay. I guess that the howlers I helped produce on FHM were a tad' sexy but they weren't sexual. They were about the fact that men needed all of the help that they could get with masculinity. We just happened to use very sexy women to offer up the advice.
In fact in the last couple of years I've not been responsible for very much other than some interesting shapes in powerpoint, some bright ideas that made it to the back of the deck but no further and the occasional brief that led to an unremarkable piece of communication.
Yet I'm still in employment that keeps the animals in holistic pellets and keeps my wife in footwear with fur linings, or fur outers, or fur trim... furry footwear. And I seem to be in demand within the industry. I have, it seems, conjured up a reputation based more on my ability to enthuse than to produce. Though that's a guilty secret.
Of course I'm currently in an agency, a country and a context that demands a staggering overthinking of the ads we produce. Fashion houses decide on a world in which they want to live, usually a beautiful world were normal rules don't apply and proceed to shoot beautiful but ultimately empty images set in that world. Most of these ads are done 'in-house' - by the companies themselves - yet it's the ad industry that takes the bullets for perpetuating the unrealistic images that drive young women to self hatred.
The truth is that most agencies in the US are churning out boring ads full of borning looking people all enthusing about a product that has helped fix their overactive bladder or their 'out of whack' cholesterol.
We'll I'm afraid that I'm really rather fed up seeing ads in which two women in a kitchen (I cleaned that one up from the ad' agency version) discuss the cleaning power of maxi-pads or the summertime smell of a cinch tag bin bag.
If pictures of beautiful people promote self hatred then surely the majority of work out there promotes a deep seated hatred of mothers, middle aged men and silly slags everywhere.
I'd rather watch Paris Hilton fellating a Carl's half pounder than I would see a fat but weirdly happy girl ordering a salad and "Lovin' It" (and why do fast food ingredients always tumble in slo-mo from above?)
Hell I'd see Barry Manilow fellating Famous Nathan than I would another Erectile Dysfuction ad.
So I've decided to do two things.
To make some interesting advertising that says something and enters pop culture. Cool stuff that changes the way that people think.
And to make some mindlessly sexy advertising that does nothing other than titilate and provoke a warm tingle or two. Something that we don't overthink. And that twists the macrame'd hemp panties of moustachio'd do gooders of every gender.
This blogosphericals is my vow.
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